Photos with date are Kodi’s – thanks again Chica!!
Early Thursday morning - I'm talking 3 AM people...
**Delusional (to persuade somebody to believe something that is untrue or unreal)
Table for one. I wasn’t ready to call it quits just yet, that bottle of tequila that Raquel left for me on Tuesday was calling my name and I was taught to answer when someone is calling your name.
I set myself up on a lounger by the pool with a pillow for the upcoming rebellion of the grey cells, a sarong for a blanket, the bottle for warmth (ha ha), smokes and my music. The breeze was refreshing, the house behind me dark, and the cops across the street giving me comfort to be alone, awake and outside on this end of the island.
Civilian shot of tequila – niiiiiiiiiice!
Private shot of tequila – I can still make out the stars overhead.
Brigadier General shot of tequila: How could I leave this island and not have a one on one conversation with this place? Isla always talks to me when I visit but this time I think the aerial reception is jammed.
Lieutenant General shot of tequila: I became one with the island, happy in my delusional mind that Isla Mujeres was created just for me…as result I began listening to the waves….stomach contents becoming a tsunami…legs refusing to ‘Run Forrest!’ thus the tequila was retired, Advil consumed and cocooned by those wonderfully cool sheets…tell you this…the ladies are going to have to wake me up today cuz the party is continuing in my dreams. “Hey! Someone turn down the volume!!”
“Morning has broken and so is my will to live!” says my stomach to my brain. No more Military Tequila Shots…at least not by myself! First one up to get coffee going and decide, I’m taking it easy today – need to rest and relax. By the time the others arrive, we’ve all decided to rest and relax.
One and only morning shot – pins and needles in the eye sockets. My partners in crime from last night are suffering in their own way – shuffling walk, bleary eyes, stomachs set to regurgitation. Let’s just enjoy this lovely house. Wonder if Arturo is going to drop by. Doubt it but the thought is nice. We spend time by the pool, take photos from the front of our house, invite strangers driving by to come see the inside of our house – and I must say, we had to control how many folks we let come in after awhile. We reminisce over our Saint Patty’s Day and boil it down to one word: incredulity. Yeah we did all that, drank all that and in the recesses of our minds want to do it again.
Call to Apache – we’re set for tomorrow to do the boat trip – way too windy today and by looking at the sea across the road, this man knows what he’s talking about. Jackie is antsy, let me rephrase, chomping at the bit to go snorkeling. We were going to go to Garaffon Castillo Tuesday, but time gets way from you when there are yet other things to do.
Robert the Groundskeeper from next door stops by – he too is in wait for the gas tank to arrive, the one that should have been here days ago, along with the pool man and the new entry gate. Kodi shows Robert the coconut and asks him if he could show her how to get it open. He promised her before we left, that coconut would be served!
It’s Five O’clock somewhere so we have semi-virgin cocktails of pineapple juice and rum…ahh…. Mexico Time.
A BIT OF HISTORY - - - - Years ago traveling with Bob, Aelias and Mason we ventured to Sac Bajo by golf cart and turned right at the dead end past Rolandi’s onto a road that was clearly used but not known to tourists.. Apparently this is where the locals come to hang out. We discovered a tree that was covered in panties, bras, Speedo’s and t-shirts!! Oh my! A PANTY TREE!! Make out area for sure with deep tire tracks soda cans, beer bottles and empty food containers, used condoms and a ratty blanket. Blue Crabs heaving over the ground (makes my toes curl just thinking about them) in and out of their holes. From that moment on, I have made it a point to leave panties on that tree…this will be my seventh time to leave some undies!!
1 PM-ish
Hunger sets in. I am craving a popular sandwich from Mango Café called the BLTGA. Bacon, lettuce, tomato guacamole and apple on home-made bread. They have been closed each time we go by – Luck be a Lady today? Jackie is still on the hunt for a Torta, Nady wants guacamole of course, Kodi is game for anything.
We pack for the day realizing Saturday, when we leave Isla, is coming faster than we expected.
What do we have left on our must do list?
Mojitos – check
Meal with feet in the sand - check
Time on the beach - check
St. Patty’s Party – check
Tequila Binge – daily so that’s a check
Sol Beer for Kodi – check and ongoing
Shelling – check
Photos of the cemetery in town
Watermelon Aqua Fresca in a baggie
Flirting – on going so that’s a check
Learn to Salsa
Visit Big Jim
Nady’s Hair Braided - check
See a sunrise
See a sunset – check
Golf cart around the island a dozen times – check
South Point – Punta Sur
Shopping at Hortencia’s – check, check, check and one more round to go
Snorkeling for Jackie
Boat Trip with Apache
The PANTY TREE
Guacamole at every meal for Nady – check and still on the mark
Sunday Ribs - check
Alexis and Geovanny – check
La Lomita
Mango Café
El Varadero (Cuban food)
Overnight in Cancun – like ewwww
We better get a move on if we want to accomplish everything. The weather is divine, heads on straight , Kodi locks the doors, I start the cart and off we go!
We wave to Big Jim’s place as is our custom – man he’s gonna shoot me since I haven’t stopped by yet – maybe we’ll see him at Sancochos today or tomorrow. Cruising along the coast road, ladies looking at the sea, me at the road and some jogger that looks an awful lot like Arturo to the left.
SCREECH!!! Mango Cafe is open!! Luck IS a Lady today!! Looks busy in there – they have limited seating and we don’t mind the wait. There’s one long table with two women at one end who invite us to share their table. Gracias.
Mother and Daughter vacationing together while the rest of their family vacations elsewhere, skiing I believe. The daughter is getting ready to join a host family in another foreign land (for her college internship) and was getting accustomed to eating meats as not to offend the family she would be staying with. True Vegetarian, not Vegan, she was trying chicken today – pork didn’t agree with her system earlier in the week and she’s leery of moving to beef.
A waitress comes by carrying the food order of our tablemates: Chicken Quesadillas and Cuban Empanadas. Lovely presentation of each entrée.
BLGTA
Latin Empanada
Caribbean Empanada with Home Fries
ANOTHER SIDE NOTE: The family from Ohio (I fell in love with the daughters’ Peace Sign Carry On) that Kodi and I met while standing in line at the ferry heading towards Isla was sitting across from us!! Small island, small world!
whoops - double pictures!!
As we talk, Kodi orders a Sol – they have Corona, I’ve been dying to try their Ginger Lemonade, Nady has a Coke, and Jackie opts for Mango Tea. The mother (and I apologize for not remembering their names) was telling us of the outfit she had on from Land’s End. Clothes with SPF. Huh? Yeah, the shirt and pants had SPF somehow zapped into the fabric. $45 for the pants and $50 for the long sleeve shirt. Later that day, Kodi said if you are wearing clothes, you’re automatically SPF’ed!!
Here I go again hollering people’s names: “LORI!!”
This lady turns to look at me and says hello. I tell her I know her by the photo on the Holly Eats Web Page except you’re not holding that Strawberry Shortcake!! Lori is the owner of Mango Café. She grins and says everyone comments on that photo. Of course Kodi asks her to strike the pose – she obliges with the imaginary shortcake. I got the giggles and missed the shot! I do get photos of this lovely woman with the winning smile. We were also pleased to meet her husband Polo (owner of the Blue Iguana). Can’t wait to eat at his place. If this sandwich is a signature item at his place, my taste buds are surely in for a delight.
Cool as a cucumber I say: Hola Ursula!
Ursula slow to recognize me – then - - Hola!!!
Hugs and all smiles!!
(Bob and I met Ursula many trips ago when she worked at Color de Verano – I had brought for her young daughter a pair of Red, White and Blue Crocks. Bob is intrigued by her looks; he so hasn’t mastered the art of subtleness of harmless flirting with your wife around!!) Ursula asks about Bob – girls trip this time – asked about her daughter – going on eleven – introductions all around. Nady gives me that look and asks how many more people do I know on this island!!
We look at the limited but enticing menu that changes every six weeks. I didn’t see my sandwich listed. Find out that it is served at The Blue Iguana across the street (which is closed for the day). Ursula saw my disappointment and says she will go across the street and gather the ingredients. OH BLISSFUL JOY!!
Kodi doesn’t want anything. Nady and Jackie order Latin Empanadas and Caribbean Empanadas minus the eggs. Jackie wants to try their home fries too and after a taste, Nady orders the fries as well. They were pretty tasty! Since my sandwich would comprise guacamole, Nady didn’t order any.
Oh My Goodness!! This giant basket gets placed in front of me with the sandwich of my dreams!! They are not stingy with ANY of the toppings! Eyes wide and everyone gets a taste. REAL tomatoes that were ripe, RIPE mind you, RIPE!! Thick crispy bacon, mounds of creamy, chunky guacamole infused with cilantro and onions. Fresh lettuce, just enough to give color, not become the meal and the bread…I could have eaten this bread for a week on Isla –thick sliced homemade grain bread. It had to be thick to hold up all the toppings! To my surprise, Kodi orders the same sandwich to go!! For Kodi to want to eat this sandwich or anything in a mass quantity was a pleasant surprise. Her sandwich never had the chance to leave the building!!
WOW – close the eyes and feel the rhythm of the tropical Latin and Caribbean beats – no other way to explain the explosion of flavors of Nady & Jackie’s empanadas!! Dipping sauces weren’t needed the empanadas held their own…but the sauces added another layer of flavor – where’s my salsa dancer!!
There is no rush to scarf the meal, pleasant conversation and get this – they wait until your meal is half over before they ask how everything is!! The US of A should take a hint, get a clue. Let the clients digest more than a teaspoon or at least get the fork out of their mouths before asking how is everything. I decide that when I dine in the states and I haven’t had more than a spoonful, I will say to that ambiguous question “Don’t know yet, waiting for the fork to give me its opinion.” That should keep them off me for a while.
Our companions head off to their next adventure – Kings Pool at the Avalon Hotel. We wish them well.
Nady turns to Jackie – Girl, something is wrong!
Jackie: What? Something wrong with your food?
Nady: I can’t get my eyes to focus.
Jackie – I have some blurred vision too!! And I feel kinda sleepy.
(Catz in my mind – oh great – food poisoning!)
Kodi: Did you take the entire pill?
Catz: What?
Kodi: Muscle relaxers – told them to take half.
Jackie to Nady: I told you she said “half”!
Nady: My bad! I thought I was freaking out!!
(Catz in my mind – WHEW!!)
Before we left Nady & Jackie took a pill to relax them, you know, kinda take the edge off the massive hangovers. I had no clue this took place – seems the Momma Hen in me was handling my own hangover in a different sort of way.
Now that we knew they would live, we finish our meals; pat the protruding bellies as Jackie orders a tea to go. It wasn’t the same Mango tea but she enjoyed it all the same. Our tab was around $415pesos. We left an immense tip for Ursula who tried to give most of it back to us. It’s all good and worth every peso of it. Hugs, kisses, to go cup of tea, toothpicks and mints from Ursula. Kodi pets a dog relaxing in the shade of the building. We’re off another adventure.
Into town to take a few photos and pick up dresses from Hortencia. Jackie loses a shoe as we’re driving into town – Kodi retrieves it and I can’t help but take off as if to leave her as she runs ever so lady like behind the cart!! We have to stop and take a photo of Jackie in front of Casa Rosa right off the airport strip – next door to Ixchel B & B and next door to Casa Linda and Casa Luna Turquesa. She has an Aunt with that name. Method to her madness. We meet the lady staying there - $600 for the week. Do-able but not near as large for 8 Syllables. We see a man carrying a ladder, a moto with five people on it, a man also on a moto carrying a floor fan.
Look at those waves!! “Shoppy” is an understatement. I could see all four of us chumming the fish our lunches. Apache was correct in delaying another day. Beautiful to look at but not to be riding on.
Finally in town, too full to get my Watermelon Agua Fresca, so we round the corner and show Nady & Jackie the front façade of Casa El Pio – they wished they could have stayed here as well. 
A few more blocks and we’re at Hortencia’s. I lost count on who ordered what. I was done shopping for this trip. Amazing to see a baby in a hammock – it was Hortencia’s granddaughter waking up from a nap.
As the ladies ordered more dresses, I began talking with two men from Canada who had just ordered shirts. One of their wives just retired and this was her Welcome to Retirement Trip with friends. They were staying at the new condos towards Sac Bajo – The Isla Mujeres Condos. One of the guys said the place was nice for two but a bit cramped for four guests. Also the water (the red water) was stinking off the lagoon and the mosquitoes were dining on them every time they set foot outside. For the price they paid, bug spray should be flowing from the showerheads. Had to laugh at that. We made fun of the differences in our countries, how we pronounced the same words but agreed that a woman shopping is universal. Told them we were headed to Sac Bajo to visit the Panty Tree – that perked their ears up a notch. I explained it to them and they thought it would be funny to get some of their wives’ “unmentionables”, put them on the tree and take them out there later to get a reaction. I told them to have a number handy for a cab and the nearest hospital!
Jackie and Nady seem a little drained. It’s not the Equatorial heat; it’s those frigging pills relaxing them. Jackie is about to fall out of the front end of the cart with each turn – I do that protective Mother Arm thing. When you’re hot, drowsy, full of food, dealing with a lingering hangover, the day seems to draaaaaaaaag - - - - but we’re determined to leave our mark on this island by leaving our panties. I didn’t bring fancy panties knowing they would be gone the next day so I purchased old lady drawers – you know the kind – cotton high wasted briefs but in fun fanciful colors. Jackie brought some sexy black thongs – knew those would be the first taken. We head up Sac Bajo – past the Turtle Farm and The Floating Island, breeze by Rolandi’s and Dolphin Discovery –towards the end of Sac Bajo - then see a sign on the right – new to me – that read:
PROHIBIDO EL PASO
PROPIEDADO PRIVADA
TIERRA FANGOSA
This roughly translates to PRIVATE NO ENTRY PROPERTY MUDDY EARTH
Jackie translated to us that it said we shouldn’t go in there. I AM BUMMED – PISSED OFF – DISAPPOINTED – AMBUSHED! This is what I came to this part of the island for. Disgruntled we head towards the house, but Nady and Kodi suggest we go back and ask the men we just saw at the end of the island “Is it safe?”
Back to square one - so we ask one of the three men standing at the edge of the island trying to sell trinkets what the sign said. He was friendly enough to say that no one pays attention to the sign and we could go on that land if we were not looking to buy it. No problem there dude. There were a couple on racing bikes – serious bikers by the size of their calves who overheard our conversation and we told them as well what we were up to. The lady said she would have loved to be “tripping” with us while her companion said it was every man’s dream to see ladies leave their panties anywhere – but to put them on a tree made him wish he’d brought his camera!!
Off we go down the bumpy dry road. Hang on back there, watch for Blue Crabs and be ready to push if I hit a puddle that looks deeper than this cart can handle !
Nady: Aw Shit!
Jackie and Kodi: WHEEEEE
I bank to the left to where The Panty Tree is located. What the….there is a chain link gate blocking the road towards the tree. Ain’t that a kick in the gonads!! Well, guess that means we find and a new tree.
We search the area for a suitable tree that won’t drown the tires in white muck – we are dressed way to cute to be shoving a golf cart. We decide on a broken bush in the first clearing seen once you turn the corner to the right.
Catz: I christen thee The Eight Syllable’s Panty Tree on March 18, 2010. Let those who venture forth and take from this tree at least wash the panties before putting them on!
Nady: Here, here!
I write on the giant orange pair:
3:10PM The Eight Syllables – Kodi – Catz – Nady – Jackie.
Damn….was supposed to write: Kodi – Cathey – Nady – Jackie. Oh well, too late, too much heat, no one knows me by my real name and I wonder who will be wearing these!!
There are seven pairs placed on the tree and take photos for evidence are taken.
In the area we were in, no one was around except of the birds overhead, the mast of a giant sailboat and the growing shape of the male biker we saw minutes ago. He saw the tree and told us he hates he missed us “dressing the tree”. I ‘m sure this guy has a hang up about panties – the look in his eyes was lust or dehydration. I vote for the first.
Anybody gotta pee besides me? Each of us answering the call in our own way – out in the open – in the bushes, behind a tree, near the cart. You decide who went where…one of those things that make you go hmmmmm!
Couple more photos, watch a few boats go by and we’re out of this inferno. We make our way to the sign that told us not to enter – gave it a wave, as well as the guys at the end of the road and made a bee line for cooler air and fingers crossed to take a peek at The Floating Island .
Jackie is really looking pale so if we can get into The Floating Island, we’ll make it quick. If not, we’re headed home. As the day would have it today, the floating island man was busy working in the sun and his attitude showed in his tone of response.
Catz: Hello the House!!
Floating Island Dude : COME BACK ON SUNDAY – I’M BUSY HERE!!!
Kodi: Damn.
Nady: Double Damn
Jackie: Going a whiter shade of pale
Okay Dude – we’ll visit another trip – we won’t be here on Sunday (BOO-HOO).
Jackie is looking clammy, not sweating and lethargic to boot. Heatstroke in the making. Flooring the cart at 34 MPH we make it home in twenty minutes – if the ride were made into a cartoon, the iguanas would be lifting their legs forty feet to let us through and the oncoming traffic would be swirling with our wind speed. We make Jackie drink a full glass of water and head straight to bed, door and curtain closed, with the air on sub zero. Stay there for at least an hour.
While Jackie was reconnecting with her true self the rest of us decided to have cocktails by the pool. Taking photos of the world going by us on the golf cart for a bit. I can’t get over cars and trucks invading the island. I’m glad to have known this island when there were only motos, golf carts, bikes, taxis, and delivery trucks on the island.
I just noticed that empty shell of a building behind us. That I find out later is a condo that ran out of money not far from Garaffon Castillo. Couldn’t complete the outside, ran out of money for a sewer line and is just sitting open blocking the views. They are doing pre-sales to get money in to finish – one model to show and expensive enough to buy a small house on the island. No thanks. Glad we don’t have to look at it much from where we are here at the Shell. But I bet it’s a killer for those on the Caribbean side.
Kodi wandered next door to see if Robert the Groundskeeper had a reasonable facsimile of a machete – she was bound and determined to get into that coconut she picked up on Tuesday. Robert came over a bit later with a green coconut from our yard and a handsaw. Kodi and Robert kept at it until both coconuts were opened. Green coconut guts are the consistency of slimy Jell-o, an acquired taste I will never have. I gave it a shot, yeah, I’ll never hanker for it. Nady bravely took a spoon of it. Tastes like a raw Flan. I can see that. Now fresh brown coconut guts are smooth, fragrant and if you ever had a freshly opened coconut, you know the pleasure.
Ever since Kodi found her coconut and we had some limes on hand, her mantra became “You put the lime in the coconut and drink it all up. Therefore we took shots to honor the song.
Walking out the door with a fresh drink I see a cruise ship in the distance. Looks like a Carnival Cruise. I’d rather be here than on the ship. Wonder where they are headed - - Cozumel - - Playa - - Cancun - - Belize - - can’t be Cuba…oh well, I lift my glass to the ship and recline on a lounger.
Two hours later Jackie emerged …our old Jackie. She swore she wouldn’t take any more pills to help her relax; a Mojito would be just fine!
The sun is setting and we’re all feeling relaxed. No one wants to call it an early night cuz it’s so near the end of our vacation we need something to do. Of course we’ll go in town to eat, then find a spot for a few cocktails. I’m opting for Sunset Grill for dinner and cocktails since we haven’t spent but one day on the beach. Kodi wants to go back to The She Bar for Sergio and cocktails. Nady wants to bring our drinks with us stroll through town and that Malacon Wall I keep talking about then eat something. Jackie wants Mojitos and nachos. Lots of great choices so here’s what we do:
Stand outside in the dark for ten minutes. That wind is howling and the temp has dropped to an unseasonably cool fifty something. So the Malacon Wall and Sunset Grill are out. That leaves us La Lomita for dinner and The She Bar for cocktails.
Don’t forget the pink blanket!!! In the time it took us to dress the temp plunged again. I have never been to Isla when the weather was this chilly….never below 70 – this is freaky weather.
La Lomita here we come. I’ve been here and know it’s great and inexpensive. Let’s hope they are open.
We arrive and it’s got some business going on. I swear I know that lady in the pink top with the long brown hair from a previous vacation. Ophelia the owner is as lovely as ever, never seen her without her lipstick. 
And is that…no it can’t be…yes…it’s BETO!! The Sumo Wrestler looking guy who wears his hair in a bun and loves his soap operas and game shows!! Hola Beto – he tries to remember me – he may or may not – so many people come through here. He takes our drink orders while we investigate the menu. I want that soup my HusBob always has, not sure if it’s the bean Soup or the Lime Soup…. So I go for the Lime Soup, Kodi isn’t hungry, Nady wants guac and fries, Jackie has pork chops.
Out comes the guac and fresh fried tortilla chips – good flavor but not a match for Leonora’s guac at Alexis and Geovanny. The plate of thick cut fries comes out next – wow!! Never seen giant fries like that before. Jackie’s chops come out next, three good sized chops covered with red achiote paste. When my soup comes out Nady says “Damn Girl, that’s the soup?” You bet. Giant bowl of goodness, guaranteed to suck up any alcohol consumed yesterday, today and tomorrow. Beans, rice, avocado, limes, broth, onions, tomatoes and chicken chunks. Everyone tasted everyone’s items and Nady decided to get a bowl of Lime Soup.
There was no way I could finish this soup – I gave it my all but only finish 3/4 of it. I could go to sleep now. Nady polished off the guac, the fries and half her soup. Too bad we were moving on for cocktails – we both hated to leave our soup behind.
Parked at the end of Hidalgo near the cemetery. Jackie made sure to bring the blanket along – if we left it in the cart it would surely be taken by the time we returned. Kodi is dancing up the street to The She Bar. I’m along for the ride. I hope Kodi is not expecting the place to be as lively as it was last night. In my years of great parties and clubs, one night rocks, the next will be dead. Well, my expectations were let’s have a few beers and move along. Kodi was expecting St. Patty’s Day Part Two. Nady was hoping to be noticed in the company of Jackie. Jackie was not quite in the party mode but majority rules as always. We enter a quiet bar – ten people and boxed music, no DJ. Sergio was there. So was Arturo – who for some reason gave me a nasty look. Now I just can’t have that.
Kodi ordered the first round, and danced with Sergio and began blowing the whistle she got from him the night before.
Jackie the second round and was being hit on by some old guy who wanted to put his tongue in her ear – talk about a wet whisper!
Nady is loving this swinging chair - she said she could do LOTS OF THINGS in this chair - sign me up for a chair my address is....
I wasn’t up to taking many photos tonight, I just wanted to be left alone in that swinging chair, drink Sol, smoke cigs, listen to salsa, dance with somebody and wonder why Arturo was being such a dick.
So when it came time for me to order the third round from the bar, I was about to mention to Arturo that we waited for him when this dialogue happened - - -
Catz: Hola Arturo – we waited for you yesterday
Kodi: Yeah, Thought you said you were coming over – you lied!!
Arturo: I did come by around one o’clock. I jogged from North beach ALL THE WAY DOWN to the Shell House.
Kodi: LIAR!!!! (That was the beer speaking up)
Catz: Kodi – chill a minute. Arturo did you really come by?
Arturo: Yes I did. There was a giant gas tank in the yard; a window to the house was left open with a black laptop on the counter next to some fan coral, a doll sitting on the coffee table, a pink blanket on the couch.
(Now unless he came by, how would he know what color the laptop was and where it had been placed? And weren’t we waiting for a gas tank to be delivered? And I did leave one of my troll dolls on the coffee table and Nady left the pink blanket folded on the couch!)
Catz: I am so sorry we didn’t wait a bit longer for you. Were you wearing black shorts and a red muscle shirt – heading our way around 12:45?
Arturo: Yes that was me. I was not happy that you were not there.
Catz: Well, you said you MIGHT come by. We didn’t leave until one o’clock so we just missed you.
Arturo: I wish you would have waited for me.
Catz: What can I say but I’m sorry? (I bought him three shots to apologize.)
Arturo: It’s okay.
WOW – he did come by. You never know when you invite someone over if they will show. With it being OUR vacation, I didn’t want to waste it waiting on someone…..I HATE waiting. It’s not like anything was to happen other than cocktails, swimming, conversation and lunch. Oh well, at least the dirty looks for the night was over and I continued my party for one in my mind.
I got asked to dance by Juanita who had a cake in her fridge for our homeowner Raquel – small island, remember?! I told her I would pass the message after our dance, she’s in her late sixties and danced circles around my knees - I’m a much better chair dancer!!
Kodi got her ear licked by the guy who was trying for Jackie – like EWWWW!!! I know this guy - his name is Juan -ohhh, I'm telling!!
Nady, Jackie and I were people watching - she’s drunk, she’s out for a booty call, she’s just lost, and what’s with this chick in the khaki jeans? Khaki Jeans was being felt up by various guys who bought her drinks. Guess she calls that having a good time. I call it foolish. And the thing is she came by herself.
I nudged Nady to start watching this group of young men (20-ish) whom I called The Pretty Purse Boys watching the ladies…or so we thought until we truly started watching them. They were scanning the floor for purses, cameras, anything left behind by ladies dancing or were too busy flirting, drinking or being felt up to notice their stuff. I had already wrapped my camera bag four times around a chair next to me and covered it with my jacket. If they want my stuff, they will have to take the chair along with them, leading me to open a Texas Size Can of Whoop Ass. Yes, it fit in my carry on. Needless to say, they spotted me looking at them looking at my gear and gave me a wide berth for the rest of the evening.
Then she got asked to dance by a guy who turned out to be a dance instructor – she learned some moves, got dipped, swirled, twirled, semi- levitated within one long song!! You go Kodi!! There was a couple who were a great salsa team – he in flip flops, she in heels. Watched them for a while. 
these are our parting shots with Sergio - so good I put them in twice!!
Off for a final photo with Sergio, gave Arturo a wave goodbye and we were off to ponder the events of the evening. Think I’ve had enough night life this trip.
Look over there! A woman of 100 comes in with her green boogie suit and orthopedic dance shoes on. I call her Tiny Dancer. She gets her groove on with a female dancer, then gets Sergio in on a dance. She takes a breather next to me and says that “this bar needs to put railings around that elevated dance floor before someone falls and breaks their ass!” I spit my beer a mile and laughed so hard I had tears in my eyes. On that note I had to regroup in the bathroom – I couldn’t stop laughing. So I put my hair up, for a sexy look, a dab of lipstick, walked back out and got the giggles all over again at the sight of Tiny Dancer. She moved to the island thirty years ago and plans to rest her bones here. She comes out every night for exercise which she calls dancing. Then goes home for a nightcap and bed. You learn so much when you are open to conversating with the locals.
That's Juanita on the left - great dancer!
Announcement! Announcement!! A guy just proposed, she accepted, shots given to the happy couple. Khaki Jeans pulls out a wad of money and offers to buy the couple drinks. Then she put her money back in her purse and laid it on a table. Oh Lord – that spells trouble. The Pretty Purse Boys spotted her purse, looked around and saw me looking at them. They walked away. I didn’t care one way or the other cuz Khaki Jeans was making her way over to Kodi. She was commenting on how pretty Kodi’s dress was and how pretty Kodi was! Oh –oh. I don’t judge lifestyles unless you throw it in my face. Khaki Jeans was given the brush off by Kodi and decided she would come sit in my lap, feel up my right leg and tell me I was the prettiest African American she has seen in a while.
Khaki Jeans: Mind if I sit down? (I didn’t know she meant my lap)
Catz: My boat don’t float that way. You have two seconds to get out of my lap.
Khaki Jeans: Oh I’m sorry. There are so many pretty ladies in here and I just came in tonight. I just broke up with my partner so I’m down here for a month on my own (she shouted the last part)!!!
Catz: Good for you and your two seconds are up. (I gave her a hearty shove out of my lap) and looked over to Nady who was laughing with Jackie about the chick in my lap.
I go to the bar for another beer and sit at the table with Jackie and Nady. Khaki jeans sits next to Jackie who gives her not the time of day. Khaki Jeans was so wasted she didn’t even notice what was going on in her world. I moved along to the bar to chat with Arturo and get some fresh air.
Evening has slowed to a crawl. We’re about ready to call it a night when Khaki Jeans sitting next to Jackie, gets up and starts wandering around like a Zombie. She’s searching for something. Her purse. She asks Arturo and Sergio if they have seen her purse. I look around and notice the Pretty Purse Boys have left the building. Bet her purse was gone with them.
She remembers putting her purse on a table after buying the engaged couple a drink. She had EVERYTHING in that purse, passport, money, birth certificate, flight info, hotel key. If it were a different situation I would buy her the shot called The Royal Fuck cuz she is totally screwed. We half heartedly searched for her purse which was devoid of money and probably floating with the fishies off North Beach by now.
Nady wanted to help her in some way. Give her cash for a room for the night cuz she ain’t staying with us. I’m sorry but she asked for it. Traveling ALONE… All her documents in her purse. .. Announcing where she was staying. ..Felt up by half the men in the bar. All I could do for her was pray that she sobered up enough to go to the police station and take it from there.That was a lesson to be learned for the Eight Syllables, don’t be so messed up you don’t watch your stuff and for heaven’s sake – DON’T ANNOUNCE TO THE WORLD WHERE YOU ARE STAYING IF YOU DON’T KNOW THE PEOPLE who could jack you up in a heartbeat.
As we were departing for the evening, I shook hands with Arturo who said he was leaving Isla Mujeres in three months for a better place – he didn’t mention where, I didn’t ask.
He did say something to the guy at the bar while he cocked his head in my direction
Arturo on the sly to the guy at the bar: Que la mujer tiene gusto de malo imitación ella es demasiado grande para mi gusto!
Catz to Arturo with a cynical gleam in my eyes: I understand more than you think I do!!
If I gave a damn I would have been offended but I am a traditionally sized African American Woman, happy with whom I am!! Guess he didn’t get the memo that I am a Queen, not queen sized where I come from. What he said was something like “That woman likes me - too bad she is too big for my taste.” Yeah and if I were THAT kind of woman, you would be begging me for mercy, if you catch my drift.
Back to our house, we huddle around the couch and just exist for a while.
I didn’t know what the others were thinking but I was in a grateful mode:
Grateful that our stuff wasn’t taken because a window was left open.
Grateful cops across the street watch this house and Raquel’s every night.
Grateful for common sense. Not everyone is born with it ya know!
Grateful we have a day and a half to go.
And grateful that I’ve had enough adult beverages for the evening. Can I get an amen?
Everyone kind of just floated off into their own piece of space for the night - reflecting or just exhausted. We have been on the go from day one.
Seems I going to have first dibs on the bed tonight since Kodi is knocked out on the couch. I put us all in lock down, crawl into that wonderful king sized bed and spread out like a Swastika.
